A Mixed Bag

(This is Andrew eating for the first time after his biopsy... the mittens are because he complained that it was cold)

I think I've mentioned on here how one of the hardest things about this process has been trying to hope. You want to hope for the best possible thing but, at the same time, you hate disappointment. There is something in most of us... me at least... that feels foolish for hoping when disappointment takes place. Hope is good and right but it is that because it is a leaning into the world made new, the world without death, disease, and sin. Today the mixed bag of news we received brought this back to mind.

We have been waiting on pathology reports and the report on the MRI. We finally got some news about an hour ago. Pathology reported that one of the indicators, a gene whose name escapes me, was negative... very good news. The MRI showed that the cancer has not spread to any organs... very good news. The MRI also showed however that the tumor has crossed the midline which takes Andrew's cancer from a stage 2 to a stage 3... not so good. So far he has not changed risk levels (still intermediate) but we are still waiting for the bone marrow pathology and we are waiting for a bone scan. Further looks at the histology by the pathologist has led her to believe that there is a chance that this is not a neuroblastoma but a ganglioneuroblastoma (say that three times fast). If this is the case it would be very good news as this type of cancer is far less aggressive.

All that is simply to say we are still waiting, still trying to hope. It is hard. The soonest we will get the bone scan is Tuesday which means spending the weekend in the hospital. These walls are getting old. Your continued prayers are appreciated. This is wearing on all our family. I spent some time at home yesterday and the reality that I was leaving again brought both girls to tears. The plain fact is that in a few years, if the Lord is gracious, Andrew won't remember any of this. The girls however will probably remember how difficult this time was. Please pray them as well as for us. Cancer really does affect the whole family.